Friday, April 19, 2013

Slowing Down

You are just one week shy from being done with school for the summer. Coincidentally this is the time when we choose to stop thinking about school when it matters the most. This results in an overwhelming experience of stress and anxiety as the demands to prioritize become inarguable.  You probably work a few jobs, are in a club or two, and somehow manage to get school done.  You think you are being responsible when you say happy hour is only from 4-7 so writing that 10 page paper afterwards will be no big deal...right? I'm going to go out on a limb and assume you weren't just sipping water and swapping recipes at 'all you can drink margarita' night, and sitting down to write a paper hours later can begin to feel like a sobriety test.  After trying to have a social life, and being incapable of getting assignments done, it is easy to feel like doing one thing results in the sacrifice of another.  There is a continual struggle at incorporating fun with responsibilities and obligations which is even more apparent as you recall the multiple 'should spend 10 hours doing' projects that were assigned months ago.

During this time in life it is easy to start spreading yourself too thin as you try and tackle an excessive amount of things in a very short amount of time.  Basic health necessities are often the first things to go, such as sleeping and eating (who has time to sleep? and eating costs money that you never had in the first place).

Old people will blame this hectic schedule on technology. But that can't be it...no... checking 5 different social networking sites during the 5 minute walk in between classes isn't dysfunctional at all. Students would argue that the stakes have changed.  No one walks into the real world with "I focused really hard on my studies therefore I had no time for anything else" on their resume. Learning and life take place during the extracurricular times, when the information from that debate class actually applies to a real life situation.

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The life of a 20 something is filled with moments of excitement (like waking up in time to eat breakfast), celebration (I just finished writing that paper, time to party!), and endless motion (class, work, gym, dinner, meeting, etc).  You may feel productive as you manage 5 activities without slipping up, but could you keep this pace up forever? Eventually the pace will slow down, you are not

superhuman and Red Bull is only good for about 2 hours of an elevated heart rate and stomach ache.  Contentment will become harder to find as you attempt to maintain such a frantic pace.  It can be hard to admit that you need a break, or you may feel that others don't understand how without your planner you might as well go finger paint all day long. Chances are if you only average approximately 4 hours of sleep per night, utilize a bag of goldfish as breakfast lunch and dinner, or cant remember the last time you took a shower...it is time to take a break.


 Signs you may need to turn off for a day (or two):

  • You feel overwhelmed by your schedule instead of proactive about it.
  • 10 alarms are being set... 5 minutes apart... for an hour.
  • Your reaction to a dinner invite warrants the response..."Do you think I have time for that?!"
  • Your car got sandwiched in your parallel parking spot. Without remorse you hit 5 cars on your way out while declaring... "they asked for it"
  • You decided your closet is more functional scattered all over your bedroom floor.
  • The shower hasn't been used in 72+ hours
  • Parents and friends are being blunt enough to ask if you are still alive. 

As the school year comes to an end, and the sun starts coming out for consecutive days it is the perfect time to take a step back and relax. Please do not confuse relaxation time with catching up on three shows you missed last week while answering emails that are day overdue and Instagraming your weekend adventures.  This idea of down time sounds like a brilliant idea that has long been lost since the working student met the smart phone.  The need for downtime will usually start to sound like a good idea when you feel extremely overwhelmed and lose track of the tasks at hand.  A better solution than spending the next two days on coffee and email drafting could be taking the time to reassess the schedule and see where the stress is coming from.  You may find that more than your schedule needs to be adjusted, maybe a new situation has occurred and you are in the transition process.  Regardless if you answer your mother's personal call with "thank you for calling (insert miserable job here) how can I help you" something needs to change. 

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If this is you then chances are you may have forgotten how to have a clear schedule (aka how to relax). Here is a list that can help you forget about color coding the planner and take a moment to just breathe.  These things may make you happy, clear your mind, or put you back in the right frame of mind to not act like a lunatic with a case of stomach ulcers. Apply personal interests as needed.

1. An empty schedule-say no to things. You are scheduled to work all weekend and your friend asks you to babysit after a 10 hour work day.  (the frantic busy body thinks "awesome more money more money more money") Someone looking to relax can respectfully explain their work schedule and plan a time in the future to set something up.  

2. A clean space. No one can relax while inhaling the fumes of last weeks dinner plates, or if you sprained you ankle because it got tangled in the clothes that got left all over the floor (these will only leave you feeling nauseous and swollen). 

3. Run or walk. Skip in place if you have an extreme aversion to exercise. Anything that demands focus on the task at hand will help transition your mind from running late to the meeting to running to that cool park down the street.

4. Unlimited time to read, as in material that is not in the form of a textbook, or that requires you to properly cite it in MLA format (or is it APA?) Time like this can leave the over scheduled student feeling panicked...something must be wrong you aren't currently doing something.  See if you missed any good articles, catch up on the latest news, look through old pictures any of these will divert your mind towards less strenuous thoughts.

5. A good night’s sleep without the alert of an alarm clock. Your body clock at this point probably alerts you for action between the hours of 12 and 4 am.  Go into sleeping with a calm mind, turn off electronics, and try to fall asleep in the same day you woke up in.   

6. Spontaneous napping: you can't check email if you are sleeping (I hope).

7. Anthony Bourdain: his voice is magically soothing and something about watching him sweat it
out in a tent in Indonesia covered in mosquito nets and remain calm makes you consider not sweating the small stuff too (pun intended).

Do what makes you happy cupcakewine.com

8. Associate with someone who hasn't been "penciled in." It can be as small as the person who hands you your sushi at Kroger...baby steps here.

9. Shower. One of the most under utilized problem solvers in so many ways. Stress correlates with being busy-->Business often results in lack of hygiene-->Business also results in headaches-->Lack of hygiene absolutely enhances a head ache=Bathe yourself!

10. Do not under any circumstances think about "checking your grades really fast". This is a sign of unwillingness to fully let go. Blackboard may feel like your security blanket now, but it usually leads to online exams or mind numbing discussion boards with talk of points and weighted averages.  All of these things are the killers of calm and contentment.  Avoid the Internet if possible.






 Treat yourself right these next few days. Exams are never easy but if you go into it with a calm mind things will seem much more manageable. 

-RV

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